MKR – Sun, Feb 5 – Flirty and The Other One cook

Tonight Flirty Girl and The Other One cook in WA and the ad is making it out to be a triumph. We shall see. At least if the Flirty Vet is in the Kitchen we won’t have to endure excruciating banter between her and Brown Beard, or the dreadful “hashtag, get a room” from David and Betty.


It starts with the producers making Flirty Vet pretend to be swiping on Tinder – ick! I would really like to hear something about her life as a vet to remind us she must have a brain.
They start by driving 40 mins out of their way to get their fish for main: WA Goldband snapper with a fennel, fig and pear salad. The fillets look gorgeous.
Entree is a roasted vegie tart and dessert is profiteroles with orange custard and choc sauce.
Geez, they are spending a lot less time this year showing scenes from Coles – did they reduce their sponsorship amount?
They arrive home with the clock having just started cooking. They want their instant restaurant to seem like a music festival, but there are no muddy puddles in sight. They have, however, ensure the guests will be eating in a plastic hotbox of a marquee. Pity the poor judges in their suits.


In the kitchen, the girls can’t find the grater. This is sooo not their house. They have decided to “season” their vegie tarts with raw garlic – and they are using cream cheese, which is kinda weird. Ricotta with feta would be more usual.
Tonight Pete and Manu have swapped their traditional colours and Pete gets to wear white and Manu the mid-blue.


The menu is revealed and, tonight, David will be playing the role of Tyson as he and Hashtag Girl try and get off the bottom of the leaderboard. Why do they think being critical in public will influence others? Unless they’ve decided to go for the villain role also.
Flirty Vet is having choux pastry dramas. What has she done? It looks more like a lumpy bechamel. Did she put eggs in? She reckons she added too much milk and has more success next time. Again, no sign of egg.
They are having vegie dramas and they need more cooking but bite the bullet and pull the trays out so they can use the oven for other things. It’s poor menu planning, having everything reliant on one appliance. Their tart shells are shrinking and they end up looking more like discs. Did they even rest the dough and chill the cases before baking.
The sweet balsamic glaze drizzled over and tumbleweed of rocket is a bit 15 years ago.

ENTREE IS SERVED
(But first, an ad showing the girls freaking so, of course, they should buy heartburn tablets. What’s next? Gastro Stop?)
Manu says the raw garlic “does not belong”. “It kills the tart – big time,” he says. They’ve chopped the vegies too small and they are indistinguishable. Pete: “It seems a very, very strange choice to use cream cheese in a tart.”
The girls are rattled. One of the midwives says she liked it, the Hashtaggers are critical and the others are fence sitting and Betty is getting riled up, which is amusing Amy greatly.

In the kitchen, The Other One is stressed and has her pan temp up too high. Since it’s just fish and salad, they need to get it right. It looks like she is cooking fillets of a different thickness in the one pan. At least she knows she’s stuffed it up – some past contestants wouldn’t have a clue. I wonder if the pan is also borrowed.
At least 90 mins have passed since entree and the guests are getting loopier than usual.
Flirty is making the dressing and runs out of walnut oil. The Other One gives her a “You made me go on this show and embarrass myself” look. I hope Pete gives them a “how to cook fish” lesson.

MAIN IS SERVED
It looks bad and the girls know it – but the salad doesn’t look great, either, and that didn’t need any cooking. Flirty’s voiceover says she is having an out-of-body experience.
Pete: “Wow. I don’t think I’ve ever had a dish like this in a competition. The fish was overcooked … the salad wasn’t dressed.” No excuse for that – if they ran out of oil for everyone they could at least have put some on the judges’ plates. Manu and Pete try to pep them up for the dessert. Most of the fellow contestants feel sooo awkward – mainly because they know they are going to have to taste the fish.

Back in the kitchen Flirty’s profiteroles are all different sizes and some are deflating. And then she adds 2 tablespoons of Cointreau to the chocolate sauce instead of 2 teaspoons. Have they not practised any of these dishes? Still, SA villains Lauren and Carmine had a disastrous start to the comp last year and they ended up coming second.
And then they scramble the custard. Uh oh …
That aside, even if it had gone as intended, it’s not much of a dessert. Not even any fruit to pretty it up or cut through the richness.

DESSERT IS SERVED
Pete says it’s their best dish of the night – he’s being kind – but they needed more than one profiterole. Manu says their choux were the wrong texture. David speaks his mind on the awfulness but everyone else’s tongues are glued to their mouths by that curdled custard. Why didn’t they just whip some cream to fill wit instead – surely they had some just in case?
So it looks like the “record-breaking” touted in all the ads is for the lowest scores evah!

THE SCORES
Teams
Villains: 3
Tassies: 3
Hashtags/Real Villains: 4
Midwives: 4
Beardies: 3
Fairly generous, really. Worse is to come.
Judges
Entree: Pete 1; Manu 1
Main: Manu 1; Pete 1
Dessert: Manu 2; Pete 3 (generous, Pete!)
Total: 26.
Ouch – that is bad. “I’m sorry to say that is the lowest score ever in the history of My Kitchen Rules,” says Pete. Poor girls – that was a trainwreck.

Tomorrow night
The SA beardies get to cook and I reckon they will be good. Since we’ve yet to have anything outstanding, decent meals are long overdue.



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38 Comments

    • The fact that time got so far away from the girls, before they even started cooking? That generally doesn’t bode well for the rest of the night.

  1. OMG they are really murdering that poor fish. Shows just how bad they are at cooking, absolutely no idea what they are doing. You can see how clumsy she is when she is cooking fish, and those HUUUUGE bloody plastic implements she is using. Not a clue.

  2. Oh and also one cooks fish for 12 people, the other mixes a couple of things together for a dressing, and slices pears and figs or whatever it is. Really???

  3. Didnt see Bek putting eggs in the choux pastry.

    They wii be getting the lowest scores ever. Picked for the show not for their cooking but just foe some eye candy.

  4. Tyson: “I’m not really a festival person.”

    Tyson, you barely count as a person. Be quiet.

    Anyway, I’d hoped the girls were going to do really well, and I still hope that I’m wrong, but it doesn’t look promising, does it? I’m still kind of interested in the storyline between Bek and Kyle, though. He is a handsome guy, although I’m so curious what he looks like clean-shaven.

  5. Oh gosh, watching the disaster of the entree, I’m actually feeling a little sorry for the girls, who just look totally out of their depth here. Did they apply for “The Chase” or something and walk through the wrong door in the channel 7 casting studio?

  6. Hashtag false advertising AGAIN ch7.

    BTW – full moon was October 16 or November 14 – assuming that’s when they filmed – unless it was earlier?

      • Have you been listening to the promo ads?

        “It’s a record-breaking night on MKR … … … tomorrow.”

        Bastards. On the plus side, that means that the bearded boys do well tomorrow night.

        • Yep, every effing night last week. Seriously though, these girls are the worst ever! I knew as soon as I saw the tiny dice for the roast veges, shades of that dude that cut up the green beans one by one ๐Ÿ˜‰

          • It’s obviously not *their* kitchen — and quite clearly, the stress of the night has had a cumulative effect — but it seems like these two have never stepped foot in *any* kitchen before. Who cast them? They have absolutely no clue what they’re doing.

        • 3 records will be broken this week. Maybe Kyle will get a total score of 25. I still think Tyson will get the highest score

  7. This was funny for one course, and then it’s just turned into train-wreck television. I want to look away, but I can’t. Every single thing these girls have touched in the kitchen over three courses has fallen apart. Every single thing.

    Meanwhile, how hungry are the guests? They’ve been sitting there for about 5 hours with nothing but small courses of inedible food in front of them. If Tyson and David aren’t careful, I can see Kyle eating *them*.

      • At least they seem like decent, nice people (if tragically misguided in their belief in their own culinary abilities). I feel really bad for them, because I doubt the score is going to be anything worthwhile.

        OTOH, if Tyson and Amy scored like 20 out of 110, I’d just laugh at them.

  8. Wow, 26 out of 110. That’s gotta hurt a little.

    I actually thought the teams scored quite generously. I was expecting 1s and 2s. I was shocked that it was 3s and 4s, but I think a lot of that was pity, and the teams felt bad scoring the likeable girls so harshly.

    I’ll bet there was a Maccas run after the teams left, put it that way.

    • Wasn’t “their” house in Guildford? If so, smart, hungry people would go to Alfred’s Kitchen in Guildford for what Matt Preston called “the best burger in Australia”. Iconic burger joint in Perth but a bit out of the way for most.

  9. Yes, seasoning means more garlic. They have no concept of the basic knowledge of cooking. Thier only saving grace is they didnt cry and collapse on the kitchen floor. Maybe they did but was not shown. They may have wanted to walk out but was talked out of it. Just cant take this show on face value

  10. Knew it from the previews they would be terrible… the way they were holding knives and chopping vegetables just reeked of I quickly did a crash cook with mummy for about 15 minutes before we started the show.

    Either that, or their friends etc are too nice and compliment them on their cooking way toooo much.

  11. Beardy had a great opportunity to get some brownie points with Bek by hopping into the leftovers last night. He failed. I can’t wait to get to the supermarket and read about their “baby scandal” in No Idea. ( probably something to do with baby carrots or beetroot)

    Records were broken indeed last night…..Worst MKR episode of all time. Thanks to Juz for recapping it. I regret not watching MAFS.

    I think Tyson and friend will smash it.

  12. That was painful to watch. They decided it was worth the extra time taken to go to Freo for the fish, then whined that they had wasted so much time going to Freo for the fish. What? If by some miracle they get a chance to cook again, Flirty Vet the surgeon should take over the chopping of vegetables because The Other One has no knife skills whatsoever. And the pan is too hot for the fish, but Other just keeps saying that, meanwhile ruining more fillets, instead of turning the damned heat down. Their whole meal was a dictionary definition of ineptitude.

    I wondered why Pete felt it necessary to make the point theirs was the lowest score in MKR history, but I suppose he needed to complete their humiliation.

  13. Oh, it’s been a long time since last posting here, but I just have to…
    This was a trainwreck and I couldn’t even feel bad for them because they so obiousvly had no clue whatsoever what they were doing.
    Their custard looked like the choux pastry should’ve looked like when putting the eggs into it first. Their choux looked like Bechamel and what the hell was Bek doing with the salad if they needed 2 hours to get main out?

    Also: am I the only one warming up with Tyson and his sister? They’ve got a morbid sense of humor I am digging – but I’m weird anyway. I thought David and Betty were much more obnoxious last night. HASHTAG #stfu, please.

  14. The only reason I’m disappointed they scored so low is it’s taken obnoxious
    #daveandbetty off the bottom of the leaderboard.

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