MKR – Wed, Feb 17

Nev and the Missus cooked and it most definitely was not the duck’s nuts?

Sorry, didn’t have time for a full recap for this one.

Here is the menu and pix of the finished dishes (they’ve made the dangerous move of listing every ingredient, so there’s no wriggle room.
Entree: Seared scallops with corn puree and crumbed crackling.
Main: apple cider pork belly with fennel chips, honey carrots and gravy
Dessert: Apple pie with vanilla ice cream

Some thoughts:
* Don’t you wish you could afford to walk into a shop and buy 50 scallops.
* The Hollywood theme looked more tacky Las Vegas.
* One thing that impressed me when the sisters cooked was their use of about three different timers stuck to the fridge – perhaps Nev could take a tip and not burn his crackle – TWICE – next time.
* Jess’s outfit was the most normal yet, but looked like a synchronised swimming costume that has been turned into a dress. Her makeup looked less harsh than at past restaurants. And no compression socks – yay.

Top half looks quite nice; shame about the rest.

Top half looks quite nice; shame about the rest.

n jessoutfit

* Good flow of flavours throughout the planned menu, from the crackling dust on the scallops, to the pork crackle of the main with apple cider to the apple pie.
* I thought he’d said they’d made fennel chips before, right?
* Was that hot apple they put in the pie? Surprised she didn’t make the pie pastry at the start of the night so it could rest. That pie could have been baking while the pork was resting. Why not do two pies? The also could have quenelled the ice cream and put it back in the freezer, ready to serve. It’s not like they were doing lots of tricky stuff while the main was cooking – just those disastrous fennel chips.
* What up a beat up of the “drama” between Jess and “bitchy” Luciano.
* Loved the comment from Martino (and where is his hat, by the way?): “They’ve killed the fennel. It’s dead; completely dead. This is a funeral.”
* Looking forward to having Colin back on screen, and the introduction of Rachel Khoo, but not sure if I have the stamina for yet another round of new faces. Who will be our new villain? Please can we have a bloke this time?
* Was her “tastes like bought” ice cream worse than Cougar’s? Sure, she used vanilla essence, but at least there was no condensed milk.
* Kell is definitely the calm one under pressure.
Team scores: Miners 4; Lovebirds 7 (what the heck!); Sisters 5; Italians 4; Jess and That Dude 3.
Judges: Entree Pete 9, Manu 9; Main Pete 6, Manu 6 (both seem overly generous – scoring to ratchet up the tension?); Dessert Pete 2, Manu 1 (ouch!).
Total: 56.
* I don’t know why Pete said their entree was “thinking outside of the box”; sure they did well but it’s hardly a new dish.

This Sunday night is the moment of truth for Jess and He of the Serial Killer Stare, and he promises: “We’re going to mark the highest ever for My Kitchen Rules.”



  1. Is no-one else in NSW?

    Um. Mr Duck Nuts, we think that DM has dug up some of your secrets.

    Has anyone else noticed that the contestants seem to be consuming Fuze Tea?

    No hosiery tonight. ๐Ÿ™

  2. Cola cola is one of the sponsor and they have used MKR to launch the Fuze Tea last week. The ads started last week and product placement was very obvious

  3. a pot – kettle – black moment….Jessica called Luciano bitchy tonight…I choked on my own dinner….a real WTF moment.

  4. What has Kell been doing? Pretty nothing much and still didn’t have time to do the pastry.

    Also you know you are cooking for 12. Just do the math in your head and you will know how much pastry you need.

    • sigh…. yep, yep, yep. Such a long wait. I think he spent an hour trying to make the chips while he burnt the crackle.

  5. Fennel chips – not quite the ducks nuts….. 3 sad little lumps of lard. Where did all the pork go? They bought 4 or 5 packets of it at the supermarket.

  6. When Nev and Kell were introducing themselves, Nev said that they’d been together for 3 years, and that he’d aggressively wooed her.

    Was that while Kell was married to your brother, Nev? It’s bad enough pursuing somebody who’s married, but your sister-in-law? Not cool, bro. Not cool.

    • I read in a book about the Milats that it’s a way that siblings get square with each other in dysfunctional families. The way Nev carved up the apple pie made me think he was a Milat.

      What a spectacular crash and burn. Okay, the scallops were winners but then Nev wanted to marry the fennel. Topped off the fennel fail with a crapple pie.

      • The apple pie even *looked* awful. It’s apple pie, you know. How’d they get that one so wrong?

        On the other hand, the miners are safe, and I like them better, so all’s well that ends well.

        • You knew Nev was struggling when his attempt to cut the pie was like something out of Texas Chainsaw Massacre.

          Can you put the pie in a blast chiller to get it cool quick enough to cut without Nev’s mutilated mess, I wonder? Still stuck with the blotting paper ice cream, however.

    • You know the one time I actually felt bad for Jessica is in that little promotional short, where she says, “We’re gonna knock out all the competition!” and then she laughs this really forced, awkward giggle that lasts for a good ten cringe-inducing seconds, but it feels like she doesn’t really know how to laugh? The whole thing is just painful to listen to.

      I don’t know which idiot at channel 7 let this person anywhere near a television camera, but by gosh …

      • Yes the unnatural laughter and her clear issues with food, erratic scoring and difficulty in telling a consistent story made me wonder if Ch7 should have had a more thorough psychological screening.
        She described herself as one of the ‘popular’ kids at school but I would have picked her as being in quite a different group. Narcissism often masks self loathing.

  7. From the promo, you think Jessica is gongski. At least Miners are safe.

    Lovebirds tastebuds must be off tonight. Just because you like one element on a dish doesn’t mean it is a good dish

    • I’m leaving my hormones out of this (after all, my heart still beats for Jordan), but I’m glad the miners are safe, because they just seem like really chill, upbeat, pleasant people to be around, and I’m totally glad we’ll get to spend more time with them. I doubt they’ll win (they don’t seem to be the best cooks, no), but if you had to pick either them, or Jess/Zana and their respective plus ones to go to dinner with, who would you pick, you know?

  8. Oh, what a bad night. I still thing that Nev looks like a miniature bulldog. And I really cannot stand Kell’s voice. :/ So I am not unhappy about them about not succeeding (my new challenge I got today from my boss: Stop using the word f.a.i.l.! Use something more positive. Then he gave me an evil grin and made a bet I won’t make it for even a day not using that word. That means I will most likely owe him a cheesecake and a Welsh fruit cake).

    Still adore the Italian guys. Next MKR looks surely like pure fun. I somehow hope Ms. “Face is too tiny for her head” and the other guy do not succeed (see, made it!). I feel sorry for her. We Germans use the word “fremdschรคmen” for that. That’s how I feel about her. Her personality is so unlikable, I don’t think she is much nicer without cameras.

    • I’m rapt that Nev and Kell “failed”. Watching it happen in a blaze of mindless arse slapping and “babes” was the duck’s nuts.

  9. Would the ‘real’ Jessica’ please stand up. You don’t know from one night to the next which one is going to rock up.

  10. I keep on thinking Jessica looks like Jodie Foster and expecting Anthony Hopkins to pop in as a surprise with his kidneys and fava beans! ๐Ÿ˜€

  11. I was quite surprised at the Lovebirds scoring compared to everyone else’s. I think they had to be scoring on a friendship basis more than a cooking one.

    MeV is really passionate about his cooking future isn’t he? Kell is just along for the ride and to support him all the way.

    I’m surprised the judges didn’t ask where the roe was on the scallops but maybe they don’t sell it in W.A. I love the roe.

    That poor apple pie, I could even do better than that and that’s saying something. The ice cream looked like the no name brand at its very cheapest, fancy using essence, what were they thinking? Or in this case they weren’t.

    • They didn’t seem to use any eggs and dumped cream straight into the ice cream maker – it could have been worse, they didn’t use condensed milk.

  12. I get the feeling Jess survives… they only showed two bad moments from their restaurant and that was really the italians saying they wont eat it (which could be more to do with them being insulted italians that her lasagne is not what they think is lasagne)… and the other the slighlty overbrowned cake crust. Reminds me of how they try to make a contestant look good/bad and in the end it’s the opposite. Like after the promos for “Ducks Nuts” you’d think they did alright…

    • Yes, I think the bad moments shown on Jess’s promos are the only bad bits they could find to make it look like they are going to bomb. Like when Zana and Plus One cooked they kept showing the smoke billowing out of the oven, which turned out to be the only vaguely disastrous thing of the whole cook (and that was just the oven, not the food).

      • There is also a bit where Pete and Manu are both scratching their chins about what Carbzilla and her ghoul served up. Where she say’s ” it’s a trick” and then Pete says “whateva”. Sure looked like some desperation in that interlude and back chatting the judges is something an “achiever” doesn’t really do……

        At the end of the rtv day MKR, I couldn’t give a rat’s arse if Jessica stays or goes or what she likes and doesn’t like. Someone at the table scratches their arse and we get a whole segment of whether Carbzilla likes it or not. Yawn.

        I do think she’s gonna go, however. That’d be the duck’s nuts.

        • Is Pete’s ‘whatever’ actually the response to Jess’s ‘it’s a trick’? I’m not convinced that all the dialogue we see on the promo fits together – it is too easy to edit them next to each other.

    • If she doesn’t go on Monday it means we’re in for a 4th round of instant restaurants – there is no way Ch7 is going to miss the opportunity for a Zana v Jessica showdown.

  13. Hello all. Glad to see that you have found a home. Doing a great job Juz. I’m not a frequent poster, but I like to read the comments and catch up that way. However, last night on MKR there was one moment where I am wondering if I imagined it as I am usually only half watching. There was Nev massaging a piece of pork belly which I thought was merely part of the show, but no! Tell me I didn’t see an advertisement for someplace called Sage Therapies which offer massage classes.

    • Hi AnnieB, your comments will appear straight away from now on. I’m about to watch the episode so will keep an eye out for belly rubbing.

      • I think that happens around the time that Nev uses a rather large syringe to inject apple cider into the pork belly, Juz. I had to look away myself. Nev spent a bit too much time massaging Kell, too.

  14. Only did a mini recap for this one; it’s been added to the post above. Will be interested to see how the Miners go in the next round.

  15. Hi Gice just finished reading everyone’s posts for the past week.

    Grandson arrived Friday night both mother and son doing well. I’m still in NSW until beginning of March and enjoying our 1st grandchild very much.

    Now I can get back to keeping up with you

    Thanks Juz for great recaps.

    Looking forward to Survivor starting tonight.

    • Big congratulations TH, nothing like a grandbaby is there? Enjoy every moment you are there with the precious wee fella.
      Good to have you back.

  16. Hmm, checked Wikipedia, because I was curious… Cougar and cub were the second worst contestants right behind the Captain and his trophy wife (27 points) Not even that woman with her Italian stallion was that bad…
    So Jess won’t be at least that bad. I suppose. If she gets the boot, she might score around 40 to 45 points. If not, she gets 57 points. Tat being said: IF she bombs. Perhaps she’s doing alright and scores in the 70-range.

  17. From Facebook page IgrewupinMortdale:
    “Nev & Kell up tonight at 7.30pm on My Kitchen Rules!!
    Is this the same Nev that grew up in Mortdale??

    Who lived in Universal Street, two houses down from Universal Park (now Mortdales first duplex). Who we played footy and cricket with back in the 80’s at the same park. Who went to Hurstville Boys High School. Who worked at National Hire on Forest Rd at Bexley (now Kennards Hire), Who’s mum use to work at Mortdale Fish and Chip shop on Morts Rd back in the 80’s (now Kingfish Seafoods) and who never stopped picking his nose until the age of 16.

    Either way good luck Nev & Kell on tonight’s show, long as your not serving up the DUCKS NUTS!!”

    It was confirmed by another poster and that his nickname was Nifty.

  18. Much as I can’t bear Pete Evans, I have to support him here.

    I donโ€™t know how many of you remember that I dropped just over 40 kilos over a year ago EATING PRETTY MUCH THE WAY THIS GUY SAYS WILL MAKE PEOPLE GAIN, so I can tell you he is talking pure horse shit.
    And scientific? If he knew anything about science, he’d know that a mouse’s normal diet is based around carbohydrates, so to suddenly feed it a high fat diet, yes of course the poor wee things will gain weight.
    This is just sensationalist crap. And I HATE agreeing with Pete Evans, but he is right.

    • Cute kitty. <3
      But regarding Paleo, three of my friends at work did that too. One of them is diabetic and he lost 45 kilos. He is much healthier, it also helped improve his blood work. The other friend lost 20 kilos and is also much healthier. The third one has MS and has cut out processed foods and sticks mostly to a Paleo diet. His health improved as well and since then his depression phases became less. So I think it can indeed have positive effects on some people.
      I personally am not a fan of the diet, I tried it myself but as I am not a meat lover (I simply hate the taste of pork and beef, I even don't like chicken or turkey at times. Or fish.) and stick mostly to a vegetarian diet (if I wasn't such a big cheese and dairy lover, I would be most likely eating vegan), it was really hard for me. Paleo is not really suited for vegetarians. I now simply avoid gluten (thanks to IBS it is better anyway, gluten, garlic and onions are the worst trigger factors for me) and try to eat a balanced diet. That's enough. It is not a specific diet I follow, I simply eat what I want and try to keep it as healthy as possible. I sometimes eat pasta or try my cakes but I really regret it pretty fast. ๐Ÿ˜‰

      PS: Rosie, this site here was a good inspiration for me sometimes:

  19. Some of these studies have an agenda.

    Just last week there was a new recommendation for Type 2 diabetes- The diet is very low in carbohydrates and higher in protein and unsaturated fats.

    It is not rocket science that low carbs will benefit people with Type 2 diabetes. But what was the recommendation from dieticians: a high-unrefined carbohydrate, low fat diet.

    Also with paleo diet the fats are healthy fats like omega 3 oil, avocado, nuts etc. Also you eat small portion of protein with lots of vegetables. The anti Paleo people keeps trying to indicate they eat and eat hugh amount of meat and nothing else.

    Rosie, I do remember you losing 40kg. Job well done. Very impressive.

  20. Thanks, LP. ๐Ÿ™‚

    Just to set the record straight, I am not strictly Paleo. I eat dairy food whenever I feel like it, and as I type I’m eating a hot cross bun. ๐Ÿ˜€ So an occasional bit of naughtiness slips in. But I have maintained the weight loss.

    I don’t eat any more meat than I ever did before, and probably eat a lot more fish.

    Thanks for that website, Zhee. I may have seen it before, but will be giving it a good look now. Of course, as I said, I do eat a few grains (that wasa yum bun) eg, if we have spag bol, I’ll just have a very small serve of spag lurking under lots of bol, but on the whole the grains are a rarity. In fact starches in general are a treat rather than an every day thing,

  21. It got even worse:

    A shocking new finding in a Victorian study shows a burger and chips with coke appears to be better for us than opting for a water, juice or diet soft drink.

    In a trial, Austin Health fed participants burgers and different drinks combinations to see what effect it had on their health.

    They found that those that had coke instead of a healthy drink with their meal were more likely to feel fuller for longer and perhaps stop them from over-eating later on.

    The results of the pilot study confirms their pre-clinical studies in mice, in which a high fat meal with a sugary drink made mice less likely to put on weight.

    Dr Sof Andrikopoulos, Associate Professor of medicine at the University of Melbourne at Austin Health, said they thought that feeding mice meals that were high fat and sugar would lead to weight gain.

    โ€œIn actual fact what we found what was the opposite,โ€ Dr Andrikopoulos said.

    โ€œIf we had animals on the fructose diet they gained weight, if we had them on the high fat diet they also gained weight, but if we combined the two fructose and the high fat diet together, they were prevented from gaining weight.โ€

    He admits the finding that the sugary and fatty combination could protect against weight gain took them by surprise.

    Dr Andrikopoulos said if you have a fatty meal, it is probably worth having a fructose drink to make you feel full longer afterwards.

    Another load of horse shit!!!!

    • Never mind about the Coca Cola stripping the enamel off your teeth while you lose weight.

      And don’t vaccinate your children , ‘cos Pete Evans doesn’t advocate that or feeding them proper approved formula…..but you will live forever and never have to pay your bills.

  22. I’m always sceptical of dietary advice that claims a particular food works because it makes you feel fuller longer. That implies that people with weight issues eat because they are hungry. I believe that being hungry is the very last reason someone eats – eating due to boredom, anxiety, schedule, cravings means that you almost never actually feel hungry. Diets that have the aim of trying to make you not feel hunger miss the point. Maybe these diets are designed by healthy-weight people who assume that diets fail because of hunger, because they themselves do eat when they feel hunger.

    Doing the 5:2 sporadically, has really helped me by teaching that it is OK to feel hungry, and it won’t kill you to feel hunger for a short time.

      • It reminds me of the old saying, “The fastest way to become a millionaire is to write a book telling other people how to quickly become millionaires.” Same principle seems to apply here.

  23. So I saw Colin Fassnidge’s group previewed in the wee hours. Another female villain in the wings, just waiting. Should try to keep the gender balance of abrasive “personalities” a little more even , Ch 7.

    Rachel Khoo I like and have to wonder why she’s lowering her reputation to be on this show?

    • It’s exposure. MKR is still the highest rating cooking show in Australia and she is currently limited to the UK/Australian market. And well, for sure the money is alright too. I would have preferred that she gets associated with Masterchef UK (GBBO would have been nice, but as they have no guest judges, not possible). Simply a format with more credibility. But in the end, when you are on the way to the top, the show with the most viewership brings the most exposure? And therefor more jobs because people see you. And if she presents herself really well, more stuff will follow.
      Her show has been dubbed in German as well, but is running on a very small TV channel. In US no one knows her. In France she’s popular as well thanks to her old restaurant. ๐Ÿ™‚

  24. Oh, oh! Just watching Nev and Kelly and I am getting Dan and Steph flash backs with the applecider pork belly. It reminds me of the pork cooked in cherry cola.

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