Married at First Sight – Finale

So Nine has pushed MAFS out of the Monday and Tuesday timeslot (where it was a ring in for a flailing Reno Rumble) to go up against the House Rules premiere on Wednesday. Oh, and we’re at the finale already!
Let’s see how it pans out for them – Nine needs a win after a string of ratings duds this year. And Seven will miss the MKR juggernaut, which has been watched by about 1.4 million people each episode.


Chat away – what do you think the “surprise announcement” is?

Over to Daisy for another great recap:
The big finale tonight has us hoping that love might survive the massive obstacles that the sexperts somehow missed; like living in different states and wanting completely different lifestyles, like wanting a family versus not wanting kids, like wanting to spend quality time together versus wanting to make love to the mirror, and like wanting to fix a man and put a dog collar and pink cravat on him versus not wanting to be someone’s project.

Tonight the remaining three couples spend their last day and night together before splitting to reflect on their relationship. And we kick off, literally, with Simone and Xavier. Having considered Simone’s request for a little affection and some quality time, Xavier decides to look after number one and take Simone to HIS favourite thing; a football game. Anyone recalling the Dirty Street Pie fiasco? But kudos to Simone, she steps up and gets into the game. Now if only Xavier can lift HIS game. Simone, ditch this selfish narcissist. If it’s a chore to spend quality time together in weeks 1-4, forget spending a lifetime together. Xavier eventually does something a bit nice for Simone and buys pizza, then gives himself an A+ for romance and effort.

Thoughtful Mark on the other hand, is still treating Christie like a queen. That’s how it’s done Xavier. Mark’s magic is working on Christie. They are frollicking on the farm, and bonding. Meanwhile Erin and Bryce’s domestic harmony continues with some help from Betty Crocker. Yes, Erin, you can make a cake without an electric mixer…… or mobile phone. Anyhow, in good yuppy form, the love bunnies end up eating at a local restaurant instead.

About now we get some blah, blah, blah from the sexperts, just to remind us that this is a serious, bona fide, social experiment and that our couples are actually lab rats. Or love rats. Or lab, love rats. Each couple has their hurdle to overcome and we are in suspense….will they or won’t they? It’s kind of cruel really, to put couples together to attach, knowing that each have huge obstacles to making it work. I am guessing they all had questionnaires to complete with important questions such as, “Do you want kids?”

Couples return to face the inqusition from the panel of sexperts, who just seem like silly, pompous know-alls. Xavier is first cab off the rank and I am expecting him to say he is nervous, but no, he is quietly confident. Afterall, what woman could resist. I am closely watching, and Simone’s body language is not telling me we have a match. It’s a bit sad to watch Xavier’s face fall as Simone diplomatically explains that she doesn’t consider him ready to share his life, or the mirror. But this is good for Xavier because now he might learn to be less selfish and cocky.

Next Bryce and Erin step up to the plate. Erin is so nervous she breaks out in red blotches so she looks like a red and white dalmation. But not to worry; loving Bryce is willing to overlook the kids issue and keep his little cuddle bunny. His mum might not be thrilled. Then Christie and Mark wrestle with the head over heart decision of relocating for love. Again it looks like the sexperts got it so wrong, but Mark is willing to sacrifice Green Acres for love in the Big Smoke. So it looks like Happily Ever After for two of our couples……..or is it…….?

Two months later, we see Erin has gone back to buying shoes, texting and partying, but she got to keep agreeable, compliant, nurturing Bryce, so it seems she can have it all. I see an rtv show for Erin, “Baby Grows Up”, where 20 somethings learn to become grown-ups. Erin says she is cooking now with a kitchen aid. I think she means her mum moved in. Erin is finally coming around to the idea of having kids……and botox by 31. πŸ˜’ I think Erin’s best quality is her cheeky, and at times self-effacing funny sense of humour. At the start she seemed like a diva, but at the end, she was a darling.

Xavier has healed and has learned not to treat women like crap. Only women with really low self-esteem take crumbs, Xavier. Simone has recovered too, and is doing brunch in an affluent part of town with her affluent looking girl friends. Simone will be alright. She’s stunning, domesticated and seems nice.

Clare and Jono make a reappearance to tell viewers how they feel two months down the track. Clare is back with Fugly and Pugsly and they have adopted Lurch. Jono confides that he felt like more of one of Clare’s rescue dogs than a boyfriend. Clare denies it but hides the man size dog collar and pink cravat she had especially made for him. Clare is getting all her boyfriends from the pound from now on. In fact she has started dating the local dog ranger. Jono regrets nothing and is still looking for love and someone to decorate his very barren apartment.

To finish on a high note, the producers save Christie and Mark for last. They are still an item, still frollicking on the farm and chasing chooks, but Mark is willing to give it all up for love and head to the city to wear suits, sell vacuum cleaners or insurance and sire lots of babies for Nanna and Pop.
And now that we all believe in true love everlasting, tv programmers have offered us up The Notebook. Or the cynics among us can go google to see who has broken up already. Thankyou fellow MAFS viewers for reading my recaps and sharing your insights. Adios, goodnight and don’t let the love bug bite.



Facebooktwitterredditmail

75 Comments

  1. My recap on tonight’s show will be in tonight, but given the time difference between WA and the East, once again, you will be able to see it tomorrow morning.

    I don’t think any of these couples are suited. Erin just wants to have fun, Bryce wants more. Kristy might think she likes Mark, but he needs a Country Mouse.
    Xavier is too narcissistic and selfish, Simone wants someone who won’t grudgingly make room for her in his wardrobe or day, and who can come to bed without styling his hair. And Clare and Jono were a massive fail.
    Good work sexperts.

  2. I liked the concept of Seven Year Switch but its dragged on for too long.
    MAFS has had the first perfect length i reckon.
    If any of them have a chance i would say its Erin and Bryce, Christy can’t get over the distance issue and I think Simone wants to be pampered and treated like a princess, early signs indicating she ain’t getting that from Xavier.

    I reckon the surprise annoucement is going to be Alex and …. (her name escapes me) from last year, either preggers or having a proper wedding.

  3. Erin states she has become a domestic goddess while she is shown struggling to follow the instructions on a Betty Crocker Cake Mix.

    Xavier’s idea of a perfect date is a Wanderers game (dodgey editing there) !

  4. Tuning in to the finale. Feeling a bit nervous for them.
    Why would they match a city girl with a country guy? I don’t quite comprehend how they expect one or the other to give up their home.

  5. Really? Why is one person allowed to discuss their relationship with the experts alone but the second person has to discussed the relation with the partner right beside them.

  6. Awww – I do feel a bit sorry for Xavier. One down, two to go. Must admit, IMO he was shocked by her decision. She was a bit too needy and he wasn’t demonstrative enough for her.

    Perhaps Erin should have popped an antihistamine before filming πŸ˜‰

  7. Bryce desperately hopes he can change Erin’s mind about children.

    Once again, the experts avoid the issue.

  8. Oh dear, Clare and Jono. That was a total waste of air time.
    Where’s the big surprise? We’ve got 6 minutes.

  9. I was surprised that town mouse and country mouse are still together, but can’t see it working in the long run with neither wanting to move.
    Erin is growing up a bit, they might make it, Clare and Jonno, there was no need to even show them.
    Simone was too high maintenance, no one is going to be treated as a princess 24/7. Maybe she should have tried treating Xavier as a King!

    • Before they even left the Honeymoon, Xavier was telling Clare how it was going to be. He just laid it out. He didn’t ask her what she might like. He just said, “I like my own space”.
      Simone said to him, she didn’t want to be romanced all the time, just occasionally.
      I think Mark and Bryce were good at this, but it just comes down to being thoughtful and unselfish. It came very naturally to Bryce. He really engaged with Erin in a way Xavier couldn’t or wasn’t willing to with Simone

    • I like that in the end, Xavier acknowledged that he learned something from Simone and his next girlfriend would be pleasantly surprised. The only trouble is he kept using words like “I didn’t try enough”, and “I need to try harder”. He is still suggesting being thoughful and wanting to connect with a girl is a chore. But at least he was good natured about the experience.

  10. Jono liked Clare at the start, but now thinks he dodged a bullet. He said he saw the red flag in the kayak. I think he should have seen it when she crushed a worm tablet into his bowl of Chum. And when she told him, “Walkies!”

    • She’s wearing the ugliest dress I’ve ever seen in those pics. Looks like her nana whipped it up on the old Singer.

      • Oh yeah. Maria before she left the Abbey to become a Von Trapp.
        But then she did wear leopard spot leggings on tv, so I am guessing the entire wardrobe is a bit scary.

  11. I’m fairly certain i watched the whole thing, but i must have blinked and missed the surprise announcement?!
    I reckon the mystery man is a family member.

  12. Erin and that bloke were not a surprise. I liked her from the beginning, potty mouth and all. She managed to work the F word into every sentence as if it was a beautiful adjective.
    There is something about Farmer Boy that is a little creepy. I just couldn’t warm to him. I think once Christie has the baby, she’s out of there.
    Clare’s only redeeming feature are her beautiful dogs. Thank you for the screen shots. And Jono is still a Twinkie.

    • Yep, you get 10 out of 10 for Erin. She was a sweetie. But I like Jono so we can split 5 points each on that one. 😜
      Having sod that I stand by my earlier recent comment in that there are no wrong answers.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *