MKR – Mon – Lauren cooks

It’s the night where we see if Lauren and Carmine can beat the Curlies’ 60. They hop off the plane and allegedly go straight from the airport to shop. Really? Wish I looked that fresh walking through the airport.

Did they really just get off a plane?

Did they really just get off a plane?

Their menu
Vitello Tonnato (veal with tuna sauce or as Pete calls it, Italian surf ‘n’ turf)
Duck breast with figs and vincotto
Beef cheek ravioli
Lamb rack with crispy polenta and pea puree
Citrus sfogliatelle

All sounds nice but nothing mind blowing there. While the Curlies blew some of their dishes last night they were definitely interesting and pushing the boat out in terms of flavour combos and textures.
They are shopping at Coles St Agnes, which is in northern Adelaide, and grabbing packets of beef stock. Amazeballs.
Back home they explain they are sous videing both their entrees, which is actually smart because once the meat comes to temperature you know everything’s perfectly cooked. Surprised they aren’t using a sous vide machine, but perhaps that’s an MKR no-no in a home kitchen.
Carmine is determined their polenta won’t be bland this time around. Somehow the talk turns to diamonds and Lauren mentions she’d rather have a PlayStation than diamonds. It’s one of the first likeable things they’ve shown her saying.
Then she warns Carmine not to get a hair in the pasta dough, as she flips her pony tail around. I kind of hope Zana does get another hair, just so we can see her expression. Lauren gets working on the sfogliatelle pastry and it does look like a lot of effort – I hope it pays off.
The guests arrive and they’ve put Jordan in a hideous dotty shirt.

Not his usual snappy self.

Not his usual snappy self.

The guests are seated and talk turns to past performance. Zana is expecting pasta but questions whether they’ve actually done it successfully in the past. Jordan jumps in to remind everyone of the RSL challenge – the one where Lauren cooked this ritolo [sic], as it was listed on the blackboard.

Plus One then comments Lauren and Carmine are the only team to have received a one and a 10 for their dishes. Did a producer just whisper that in your ear, Gianni? Manu gave them a 10 for their saffron cockles and mussels and croutons, and then ducked into the kitchen to request a doggie bag of broth, much to Carmine’s delight.

And the ones were bestowed upon them by Fass and The Khoo when they did their infamous seafood in a bag. (This was way back in February and the other guests at the time were Dee and the Mute, Stepsies, Dad and Tarq; Chris and Cookie and Mr and Mrs Chops. Bet you’d forgotten some of those teams were every in the comp.)
Here come the judges to the tunes of Bodyrockers’ I Like the Way You Move, and again Manu gets the weird jacket while Pete looks sharp in his usual grey or blue tones.

Don't spill anything on that jacket, Manu.

Don’t spill anything on that jacket, Manu.

Orders taken, it’s back in the kitchen but not before we get the American accent. Ick. They are serving the duck on a parsnip puree – which is the umpteenth time we’ve seen that in this comp. When did parsnips get so trendy. Lauren is determined their plating will look better this time as it’s been “crap” in the past and she’s right. The veal definitely looks pretty; the duck not so successful as it’s all rather brown.

Time to chew

Manu has the duck and it’s a huge portion: “I feel that I skipped the entree and went straight to main course… it’s a beautiful dish.” He wanted to the duck skin crispier.
Pete has the veal and tuna and loved their modern take on it with the plating and adding texture. “I can’t fault the dish. The sauce is absolutely delicious.”
Everyone is surprised they had such a strong start. All that practise cooking under pressure in the sudden deaths is paying off.

Back in the kitchen they get on to main, but the beef cheek ravioli they prepared before are all sticking to the Chux upon which they’ve been laid, which is meant to be damp but looks rather dry. Lauren manages to do some patch-ups on the “ravs” and fries the polenta. Hope they tasted it. The lamb rack looks well cooked. They plate up and they are definitely not as pretty looking as the entrees – they need lessons from Mitch and Laura. Looking at the lamb I think they should have done wet polenta. And why make delicate ravioli and then smother it in cream sauce so you can’t even see it?

Time to chew

Pete had the lamb and it was “perfect”. The polenta gets two thumbs up.
Manu had the ravioli and he liked the elements but thinks they didn’t go together as the porcini sauce overwhelmed the beef cheek. Both Laura and Zana only have a few bites of ravioli.

Back in the kitchen it’s dessert time and we learn they are serving the tartufo in a glass with a choc disc on top, which will melt when a caramel sauce is poured over it (a la last season’s MasterChef). Sounds fun but hope it’s not too sweet.
Plus One loooves sfogliatelle and Lauren is happy with them, although they look a little blond. But they are having trouble with their choc discs as they’re stuck in the moulds. Wouldn’t you just temper one layer of choc, let it cool on acetate, then do cookie cutter discs? Luckily Carmine uses his concreting skills to salvage a few discs with a palette knife. The last thing they do is pour their hot caramel soz and they’d better sprint to the table before it cools.

Time to chew

Carmine is freaking out about the temperature of the soz. worriedsoz

Even Pete cracks a smile when the soz melts the disc.

Even Pete cracks a smile when the soz melts the disc.

Poor Manu has to struggle to eat the pastry with just a spoon. Yet again no dessert forks! He says Lauren should be proud of the pastry. “Crispy, golden, bewdiful. The inside perhaps a little dry…” And it wasn’t sweet enough. “But it’s a brilliant e-fought.”
Pete says the tartufo was perfect and delicious and he liked the theatrical element.
It’s fun watching the Sisters enjoy pouring the soz and Zanna and Plus One wisely decide to eat the pastry with their hands. Zana and Gianni give props for the pastry, which they admit is incredibly hard to make, but agree with Manu on the filling.
Looks like Lauren and Carmine will beat the Curlies, and deservedly so based on tonight’s efforts (yes, I know – it hurts!). If only the Curlies had simplified things!

Sisters 8; Curlies 5; Zana and Plus One 7; Anna and Jordan 7. Total 27/40
Entree Pete 10, Manu 7; Main Pete 9, Manu 7; Dessert Pete 10, Manu 7, Total 77.

Tomorrow night: It’s Anna and Jordan and it looks like the pressure gets to Jordan, at least. And we hear Manu say: “I would never talk to my mum like this.”

Windsong, are you crying right now?

Windsong, are you crying right now?

And … Just flicked the channel to Nine and it’s semi finals on Reno Rumble. That bodybuilder guy is still in it. Does anyone care?



  1. I’m guessing probably not, because Lauren’s a frankly terrible cook. And you just know that (a) we’ll have to listen to “two fiddy kay” all night, and (b) it’ll be the fault of the other teams when she serves up inedible dreck and gets scored accordingly.

  2. 15 mins in and I think the amaze balls count is at least 5.
    ‘Holz molz’ is a new Lauren classic too.

      • Imagine if played a drinking game where we had a sip every time she butchered the English language. I’d probably be dead by the end of the episode!

      • Oh gosh, all I can think, while watching this episode, is, “Stop saying peeps. Stop saying peeps. Lauren, stop saying peeps. Just stop it. Stop it. Just stop saying peeps.”

        And there’s another hour of this to sit through?!

  3. Oh no! Look like the delicious looking dessert in the earlier promo belongs to Lauren. The one with a chocolate disc on top of a glass and it melts when you pour hot sauce over it. Please tell me I am wrong, peeps

  4. I’m really not sure I can bear a whole episode of the truly appalling Lauren – she is so dreadful. But how appropriate that it’s up against the equally awful Michelle Bridges.

  5. Shoot for the stars, peeps! Amazeballs. Finger poised over mute button. Nice homemade “stock in a box”!

  6. You know, watching the episode, part of me actually feels quite sorry for Lauren. She and Carmine are decent human beings, they seem to be in a happy and stable relationship with each other (which is a damn side more than some other people), but she seems to have no idea about what kind of impression she’s leaving on-camera. It’s like, sweety, just tone down the ego and “Look at how cool I am with my gangsta style” kind of stuff, and we’d probably find you perfectly pleasant.

      • Yes there is no MKR on Sun but TV Guide still say it is IR round on Thurs. I thought We’d will be the last IR round.

  7. Oh dear. I’m not enjoying this. And just because of her mangled language. It looks like they do well. Other than foul ravs. My tv is in real danger of getting a head butt.

  8. That sfogliatelle looks awesome. Guess I need to be more adventurous when sampling Italian desserts. Ricotta cannoli being my favourite.

      • They have them at our local markets as our town is highly populated with Italian cane farmer’s families. They make some delish cakes and desserts at functions in town. Thank goodness they don’t talk like Lauren.

  9. Suddenly the cooking have improved tremendously. Still the public don’t like them and C7 will make them fail at the end

  10. Promo for tomorrow implying Anna and Jordan don’t do well. Given they didn’t show any food, I’d say all the drama is personality related. Laura showing her age.

    • Yeah, sometimes I forget Laura is only 19. She’s behaved with more maturity than most up until this point, so I cut her some slack.

    • Producers have decided that the curlies are the next team to be thrown under the peep’s bus. So they are working hard to try to make Laura the next villian. Hence the lingering shots of facial expressions that could be vaguely interpreted as nasty. She’s not giving them much to go on, though.

  11. I was so sure we’d we seeing a curlies v Anna/Jordan in the finals and now not so sure 🙁
    Maybe an Anna/Jordan v sisters?

    • Given the trouble ahead for Anna and Jordan (that the previews seemed to indicate), I’m not even certain that that’s a sure thing, anymore…

      • If they’re setting this whole season up to be a Zana/Lauren final I just… I can’t even fathom what that would be like.

  12. If looks could kill. Laura was not a happy chappy. Her brother was being more fair than her with his comments and he was prepared to score them a point higher, 6.
    The sisters were great and were the only ones at the table who were genuinely happy for them I think.
    Despite all of her disgustingly annoying habits and her out of control ego, credit where credit is due tonight and some of those meals did look amazing, especially that ice cream ball at the end. I was starving the whole way through, despite having my dinner.

    • Lucky for me I don’t eat most of the entree and mains. I do want the 2 desserts but not right now. I have gastro during the weekend and cant stomach any food at the moment.

    • A ball of icecream rolled in nuts? Where’s the technique?

      Just shows that if you select a very very simple menu, you can fool people into thinking you can cook.

      • I can’t remember whether there was filling inside the tautufo, as tautufo should be.

        Second Dessert is not simple. It’s more difficult than making croissants.

      • Pete did say it was very well made ice cream and it was just the technique I liked of pouring the hot caramel sauce through the chocolate, I thought it worked well.

  13. Anna and Jordan were fair with the scores.

    At least Zana was honest with her opinion. Just like us we were questioning about their cooking abilities and she was honest with saying she didn’t expect what they cooked tonight. She even said they can be a threat.

  14. They surely have to warm up the caramel sauce again before the guests tucked in. No way the sauce will be hot enough to melt the chocolate.

  15. Oh my god, how fake and scripted and cutesy is this tonight? Aren’t Lauren and whosis just the cutest couple. Barf! I’m laughing instead of yelling at the tv. Help me!

  16. Steph and Dan improved over the whole competition but they weren’t obnoxious. But it’s still difficult to believe that L&C served up “crap in a bag” the first night. And the image of Lauren wringing the rum out of the rum babas like they were dish sponges haunts me.

  17. “Windsong, are you crying right now?”

    No, but I want to crash through the window, special-forces-style, then wrap my arms around Jordan, give him a big hug while telling him, “It’s okay, it’s okay…”

    I bet he’s even a pretty crier.

  18. It was obvious that L&C learned a lot from their own mistakes as well as others’ mistakes. The Curlies overcomplicated most of their dishes and I think they were probably a bit overconfident. Too bad, although L makes me laugh most of the time she is very irritating. Holes moles and Amazeballs can’t believe we will be hearing more of her jargon speech.
    Why does she keep talking to marshmallows?

    • I think there are 3 teams that haven’t go to the Sudden Death. Tascia & Gracia, Anna & Jordan and Mitch & Laura

  19. He he he. The Miners who should be in The Amazing Race but ended up in MKR will now be in Ch7 new show CannonBall.

  20. Oh gosh I now have a haterade addiction.. got to go buy a few more slabs.

    1. Pasta looked awful
    2. Sfioglatelle looked too pale and not golden.. plus looked piss for just sitting on the plate (needed something with it to truely make it a competition dish)
    3. Her tempering skills are awful and the chocolate wasn’t even tempered properly.
    4. Looks like they had a sues vide masterclass somewhere.

    We can now see what’s coming.. Sisters will finish on top… Lauren + Puppet second/third, with Zana + Gian second/third, fourth to be Curlies/Ma and Son.

    This would lead to the awaited semi final show down of Lauren and Zana… channel 7 would be wringing their hands in glee…

    • And we will get the Mafia involves. Win win for Italiano!!!!

      Need to watch the SF with the mute button on!!!

      It will be an amazeball SF, peeps.We will just make another tart with broth in the sous vide. Never done before but we can do it. Who want diamond. Just give us our two fiddy Kay.

    • Totes agree, Hewho. Cream horn thing- only good part was pastry, filling was bad, no soz, no other garnish of any sort, so drab. Pasta thick and gluggy. Allegedly tempered disk used in a place where the quality of tempering made absolutely no difference, therefore no indication of whether it was actually tempered. And, omg, more parsnip puree and roast lamb!!

      When past performance is sub-par, little is expected. Contrast with the previous night when expectations were so high, contestants are punished for tiny errors.

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