Bachelor in Paradise – Americans day 2

Except more douchiness tonight from Daniel and Grant. I expect this is where we get the tears from Leah we saw in earlier promos.
Daniel is such an obvious dick that he has no hope with the ladies. Our Aussie girls are not fool enough to pash that buffoon, not even for a rose.
Jarrod’s face is so red he’s about to burst into flames from a combination of rage, jealousy and sunburn. I’m sure Keira will save him.



  1. Sam says he thinks”another sausage is going to walk in”. This is the show that doesn’t stop giving.
    I also think the Canadian and the new us intruder look like non identical twins

    • Oh god that intruder date with Megan is just excruciating. Who here watches the US version? From his surprised reaction to her trying to reflect the date request I am guessing everyone always jumps at the chance of a date. But then the US seems to have a bigger dating culture than Australia.

  2. “Hello. I am just here to provide lunch and to be your friend”.

    She has cut those sandwiches into love heart shapes.

    • Now I’m imagining a season of the Bachelorette featuring Brooke.

      Is it possible to marry 20 blokes? Like, each episode ends with a wedding. It would totally happen that way.

    • I really liked Nina and Eden, as a couple, but I just hope Nina sees through Daniel’s shenanigans. He’s a tool, girlfriend. Walk away!

      • Loved Eden’s “you need to work on your eye contact, obviously”. And Sam is sooo much more likeable now

  3. Pity party for Jarrod time.

    “I’m not second best”. Sophie thought so.

    What a show from Keira to get him jealous, not that he needed a lot of help.

    • Ha? He came second. And that was with terrible competition. Now I have the name of Jarrod’s Exile Island; Reality Check. Does Jarrod have a fever? And I am not referring to his red face, but to his delirium.

    • Well, he does have some experience there.

      But every time I think what tools Blake and Jake are, Daniel wanders into frame.

    • I thought Laurina is more cluey.

      I dont even find Daniel attractive at all. The body is more likely due to steroid and not hard work

      • I didn’t like him anyways but he lost any attractiveness he did have as soon as he opened his mouth. So glad the girls finally saw some sense.
        Would love to know exactly what he said to Laurina.

      • He’s attractive in that purely visual, muscly sort of a way. But you’re right. The body looks fake. It’s too sculpted. I would agree that it’s probably more due to chemicals than actual fitness.

      • I read that a cockroach could survive for up to ten days without it’s head, it made me think of Daniel.

    • I’m someone who liked Sam originally, but it does feel like he’s learned a few lessons since last time. He was the voice of reason during the cocktail party, and I liked that he figured Daniel out pretty quickly, and was going into bat for Eden with Nina.

      • Matty dodged a bullet with Tara. What did she say? “Sausage factory”? Noice.

        Why has Jarrod forgotten that as soon as Ali walked in he was swoooooning and had dumped Keira? He is such a hypocrite. But surely the whole horse head Daniel thing had to be staged.

        The Godfather, “I have a horse head in my bed”. Yes, Daniel.

        Good choice, Laurina. Just what I was hoping. I love that we have anotherdummy spit coming up. I just hope Megan doesn’t attempt to take her to a pie shop. Elora, I mean Laurina 😜 gets wild because she knows the producers are staging things like pie shop dates in a cocktail dress, and lesbian dates.
        BTW, I will say this for Elora, I mean Laurina, she was mainly furious about the bowling and street pie date because she wasn’t told what to wear.
        I don’t like pies either, but I would rather eat one in my pjs, than a cocktail mini.

        • I didn’t watch it, but I would be pissed off to if all the others were taken to fancy restaurants & I got all dressed up & was taken to Harry’s Cafe de wheels. She should have been told what sort of clothes to wear.

        • Then WHY didn’t he cut his Worzel Gummidge? I don’t mind long hair on guys but that is hideous straw. He would be in danger walking past horses.

          • One problem at a time. I think Sam has realised the pratfalls of reality TV — if there’s footage of you being wise, and footage of you being stupid, production will always pick the latter. So he’s being a little more careful and thoughtful. Which isn’t a bad thing.

            I saw potential with Sam in Sophie’s season. I mean, he’s still kind of quirky and weird, but I think that’s just his personality, and he’s a bit more charming this time around (and Tara seems a little smitten with him, so it’s obviously working).

  4. Wow, tonight was an interesting episode. But I can’t even lie, I loved every bit of it. But tonight’s slice of life from Fiji was “A Tale of Two People Named Jarrod”.

    American Jarrod? Wow. I wouldn’t say he’s an unattractive guy (with a jawline so sharp he could probably glass), and from what we saw, being boring is still preferable to Grant and Daniel. But wow, he just didn’t fit in with anybody. The girls didn’t give him a second chance, and Megan even tried to talk him out of taking her on a date. The date was so awkward and strange that I actually felt a bit sorry for him. I mean, Megan revealing those details about her childhood would’ve been really interesting, as a conversation, but it wouldn’t have involved much romance. Like Juz said, that was excruciating to watch. I’m kind of glad he stuck around, though. I feel like there could be hidden depths, there. Hopefully, we get to know him a little better.

    Australian Jarrod? Again, wow, but for a different season. He ditched Kiera the second that Ali showed up, and now he’s throwing a gigantic tantrum because Kiera is treating him the exact same way he treated her? Not cool Jarrod. Just not cool. Someone on FB pointed out that Jarrod’s a simple guy, when it gets right down to it. Jarrod’s thought process is about Jarrod. He just doesn’t seem to think about other people (like how he falls in love in twenty seconds, and has so for two seasons now). And I think there’s probably a bit of accuracy in that observation. Honestly, I feel like the only reason Jarrod isn’t getting edited as an outright villain is because he’s just too sad, as a character. The other ‘villains’ have had that slimy, womaniser aspect … but Jarrod’s just too pitiful for that. I’m sorry to be so judgemental of him (if he ever reads this), but it’s true.

    But see, towards the end, Kiera was playing him as well. She was treating him as a back-up whenever Daniel got bored or distracted by a shiny object … or his own reflection. The end result is I didn’t really end up liking either of them, to be honest.

    And the ghost of Flo still lingers, because I think Leah is now occupying the spot of someone who finally just snaps and begins attempting to drown people (specifically, Grant) in their own mimosas.

    I like that Sam/Tara and Luke/Lisa are still going strong. I want Eden to up his game a little bit. Someone give him a date card, let him have access to the channel 10 props department. I think Nina just needs to be wooed a little bit. C’mon Eden, I’m on your side here.

    Second best moment of the episode? Sam at the cocktail party. His counting off the love octagon surrounding Daniel, on his fingers, was hilarious. And I liked that he sat Nina down and respectfully but firmly tried to talk some sense in her regarding Daniel.

    Best moment of the episode is easy. Laurina flies in to save the day like Wonder Woman. But of all the people to see through Daniel’s shenanigans, it kind of makes sense that it was Laurina. I’d love to hear what Daniel actually said to her, but I can imagine. Every word out of Daniel’s mouth tonight was slimy and creepy. This guy has to be on a federal watch-list somewhere. And if he’s not yet, then he should be. And seeing him be given his marching orders was poetry in motion. Goodbye, King Daniel. Your reign was short, but it wasn’t short enough. Wanker.

    I’m surprised that it took so long for the girls to see through him, to be honest. But whatever, he’s gone. And we lost Blake, too. I call that a good night, by anyone’s standards.

    Since the boys have the power again, it makes sense that the producers send in some more women. In the preview for tomorrow night, I spotted Elora (who apparently hooks up with Megan) and I’m sure I spotted the British girl from Matty J’s season who Leah bullied about being a topless waitress.

    Still no Apollo, Osher. Time’s a-wastin’, here.

  5. I feel sorry for American Jared. Megan doesn’t want to date him and next week Laurina doesn’t want to date anyone, not even the guy she gave the rose to.

    • Felt a bit sorry for Mack. Only yesterday Ali was telling him he was awesome , his eyes matched the colour of the sea and his teeth the sky. The conversation was shallower than the water they were standing in. Some Paradise.

  6. The bunion ad is doing the rounds. With Jarrod being such a cry baby, we should be getting ads for tissues.
    I can appreciate a guy’s chin trembling and his voice breaking up if he hadn’t been chasing some Ali skirt two days ago. I am loving Jarrod. But for all the wrong reasons. Perhaps after this he can go on MKR, and cry.

    I think we were all played by the producers tonight. Ugly Daniel was a set-up.

  7. Ali plays the kitten….and she sure knows how to pounce.

    The Americans are doing the rounds of thegirls because that’s how the US version works. Although American Jarrod seems alright.

    Megan has the body of a godess but she is there for publicity, for sure.

  8. Woh. Daniel’s parting words were that he wasn’t upset about leaving because the “women were stale, stale bread”. A loaf from an oaf. Clearly he is making his money out of playing the villain, and probably gets more work than the good guys.
    Anyhow, to be fair, some of them didn’t come out of yesterday’s oven, and better to be likened to a carbohydrate than a protein.

    • Daniel’s breasts were bigger than some of the gels in Paradise. That didn’t help “Geppetto’s” auto destruct mission. Beauty fades, but dumb is forever.

  9. I posted on the wrong thread so excuse me but I am going to repeat myself:
    Not an Apollo fan here. He is just a pretty boy and too young for everyone. And like the magician that he is, he will make his shirt disappear in 20 seconds and then his show is done.

    • The way Apollo gets tongue tied for extended periods of time is a real worry, imo. A bronze statue would suffice.

      Not a fan of the bashful beefcake myself.

      Healthy communicators are in short supply in Paradise. Nina needs someone to talk to, so who staggers into shot, Jarrod, the alpha bunny boiler in Paradise.

    • I am an Apollo fan. I think although he is young, he seems like a decent human being (and certainly better than the rest of the dregs of humanity that 10 threw at Sophie Monk. I don’t think many will disagree with me on that point, least), he’s nice … and hot as fricking lava. I think he could actually stop traffic.

      Plus, it’ll rattle all the guys there, and let’s be honest, that’ll be hilarious.

      • To me he’s the hulk without the incredible. But I will give it toWindsong that he could stop traffic,…sorry Windsong.

  10. That was a good episode. It was LOL when Laurina got a date card, but was ready for bed. Who is she? Betty White. And Sam’s response to her was funny, “You’re on a dating show, not a sleeping show”. Laurina is pure Diva. And I loved her, “I don’t like any of them”. Me neitner Laurina. They are all dirty street pies.
    Grant needs a kick up the bum and I hope he gets it. Do we have to wait until Sunday for the next ep?

    • It’s on tomorrow night. I just can’t stand Keira. One moment she said she wants Jarrod to mingle and then she sulk when Jarrod talks to Simone. Of course Jarrod is like a puppet. He is easily manipulated.

    • Actually, I loved the moment where Sam actually pointed out that the new girl (Simone) was blonde, so everybody immediately turned to Jarrod, to see him leaping out of his chair to greet her.

      I was totally over Kiera and Jarrod’s nonsense last night. I think they’re both as bad as each other, to be honest. Either date or don’t, the pair of you.

      Next ep is Wednesday, and then Sunday is Apollo night. Even the preview already has him shirtless. Be more predictable, channel 10.

  11. I have read somewhere obscure that a number of the batchies are going to walk out – apparently they were bored.
    It certainly explains the lack of focus on half the contestants.

  12. Laurina was cracking me up. Staying in her room reading when she is on a dating show. Then get’s a date card & doesn’t want to go because she is ready for bed. Hilarious. The promos were misleading, they made it look like the bisexual girl asked her on a date. They even showed her commenting she was being set up to go on a date with the bi woman.
    That was funny when Megan thought the new woman was asking her on a date but wanted to ask Jake on a date instead. Then she got upset that he might go, where she would have gone herself if asked. They did show promos of two women kissing, so something must happen.

    • I didn’t see her leave, just throw the mother of all diva acts. I don’t blame her. This is a pack of insipid losers to choose from.

      • Laurina did what Sophie Monk should have done; nanna nap and a “Bring me something worth my time”. Reading a book is an hilarious way for Laurina to give the middle finger.

        • I think she just wanted a holiday in Fiji for a bit. Who can blame her? And all the decent guys are already taken, it’s not her fault she showed up to the party late.

    • I couldn’t spot Laurina at tonight’s rose ceremony. Maybe she has rolled her swag.

      Right at the end of the encore today she said, ” I’m leaving” and stomped off.

      She was being picked apart by the other vultures there, anyway. Pretty obvious they don’t do a lot of reading.

  13. I am about to rerun the last week of mafs sight for a lovely friend who was away at the time. Risotto, meat loaf and broccacini. She is bringing arvo tea. I am taking Nigella’s advice. She said when you have guests over, it’s not a restaurant. Stick to home cooking.

    • He thinks Simone likes him because “she laughs at everything he says”

      I laugh at everything he says.

    • For added misery, he gets paired with a brunette. Which makes sense, actually, given how useless the three experts are.

      Kicking Jarrod should not be Australia’s new favourite past-time, but I really think he’s enabling us all, here.

      • Jarrod doesn’t fully realized when he is being kicked. He always thinks he is in the running. And for that reason he is Australia’s biggest loser.

        • It’s like I said upthread. The only reason Jarrod hasn’t gotten a full-on villain edit is because he’s too sad. He’s not aggressive or threatening, he’s just kind of … there.

  14. I think the producers were so annoyed with Laurina storming off that they wouldn’t air her departure.

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