The Bachelor Australia – episode 2 – July 28

It’s day two at the Bachie Mansion (probably really day 4) and Richie will take two girls on one-on-one dates.


Presumably the ones who didn’t get airtime last night are the sane ones. Here’s a name refresher for you (but of course Natalie and Aimee are goneski and Vintaea bailed). So we didn’t really see Sophie, Mia, Tolyna, Faith and just glimpses of Kiki and Laura.

contestants with names

 
There’s a bit on Swear Bear Vintaea who obviously never watched the show before here
Again, Rosie from Mamamia does the best Bachelor recaps – they are usually posted soon after the show ends at mamamia
It’s day 2 (more like day 5) and the girls are hanging around the house in their casual resort gear and most look so much better without all the spack filler and sequins.
Osher drops off the date cards and it’s WA girl Nikki of the white hair (whom we met first in the premiere had the super high split). The others are totes jelly, especially when Richie turns up in a helicopter to pick her up – Channel 10 are blowing the budget early. How are they going to offered to pay their candle bill?
As they fly near the Sydney Harbour Bridge Nikki professes a fear of heights, so that will be exploited later in the show. The chopper drops them off at a secluded beach and then it’s into a row boat for a getting-to-know you convo. And just to remind us Richie is a true blue Aussie, he utters “crikey!” at one point.

Back at the mansion the girls are chilling outside when Kiki appears with a date card, revealing the names Sasha, (Snickers Faux Villain Keira: “She’ll be hilarious on a group date. Really loud – she’ll annoy the other girls. Heh, heh.”) Tolyna, Faith (wow – she is still wearing a lot of makeup and favours the American cheerleader look), artist Georgia, talentless singer Eliza, white rose holder Alex, another white haired girl called Laura, Kiki, former athlete Mia and Keira. Upon this, Keira utters what looks to be an “urgh” and looks like she just ate a dirty street pie. “I don’t like it,” she says at the thought of having to share the limelight. The dateless ones aren’t pleased with her reaction.
Under-the-radar villain Rachael aka Regina George tells the camera: “We’re here to date him – we’re not here to sit back and just chill out and get a tan in the backyard. I suppose she did really want a one-on-one date but we can’t always get what we want in life.”

On the first date, Richie and Nikki are having a dip in the ocean and pretending to splash each other. Nikki looks so much better with her white blonde hair all wet and tousled. The producers make poor Richie open up an already de-husked coconut with a machete for reasons I don’t understand. Real estate agent Nikki spills she was engaged to a guy she was with for 12 years. So, she’s 28 and they broke up a year ago, so she must have been 15 when they got together. She tells Richie she’s never been on a real date before. He seems to really like her, so out comes the rose and …

First pash to Nikki.

First pash to Nikki.


Back at the mansion the girls have been gathered to await Nikki’s return. Rachael thinks they won’t have kissed. Poor, deluded Rachael. Nikki says she just gave him a peck.

Nine girls arrive for the group date and it looks like they stopped at the tanning salon on the way because everyone but Eliza has Oompa Loompa-coloured legs. There’s a lot of cut-off denim and biker jackets. The girls are split into smaller groups for a retro-style photo shoot and Alex is the only one who doesn’t have to share her shoot with another girl. Keira and Russian Sasha are teamed up for a milkshake shoot.

We keep hearing about what a big character Kiki is but we haven’t seen it until now, when she walks out rocking her her 1950s leopard print swimsuit like a Playboy bunny.


Richie looks like he got a bit sunburnt on the beach date and Faith proves to be gormless yet flirtatious, comparing her modelling style to that of a potato.
Sasha works hard to ruin Keira’s photoshoot and Keira is rather meek about it – and obviously rattled.
On the next shoot Eliza is loving the dance shoot, pulling out all her dance moves. The other girls on the shoot are dying to get some time with Richie but no one wants to tackle Eliza to the grand to do it.
For the final shoot Richie is dressed like a T-bird and he and Alex get to sit in a gorgeous red Cadillac. Afterwards Richie says he got a few butterflies: “I was like: Be smooth, Richie, be smooth.”
The other girls come out to watch them giggling at each other. Sasha drily says: “Imagine how pretty their babies will be.”


The photographer makes them pretend to kiss while Keira provides sarcastic commentary just metres away.

Here we go again, showing how cool Richie is by having him rock up on a motorbike for another date. “Oh my god he’s so bad boy,” purrs Georgia. He’s there to pick up Olena the mysterious Ukrainian. She’s a 23-year-old make-up artist who has had a string of disastrous dates. “We have nothing to talk about or he sets my hair on fire … that’s another story,” she tells the camera.


They go for a ride and she asks him some not-so-superficial questions about his family and future kids, fearful she won’t get another chance. He gives the usual “kids, eventually” answer.
Richie takes her back to his bachie pad.
“That’s my sleeping quarters – wait to you see that,” he tells her. Cue both of them cracking up. They go for a swim in one of his many pools even though it looks like they are freezing. She’s luring him in with her mysterious eyes again. He says he has another surprise for her but it’s not a rose: it’s a figure-hugging red dress that she puts on and rocks – the other girls are going to die.


“I feel like you challenge me a little but, which is great,” he tells her, and hands her a rose.

Back at the mansion the girls have started drinking already and there are dress splits galore. Nikki from the first date has a full-one J-Lo plunging neckline green dress on but it’s too short.
Richie takes Nikki off for a chat but then Alex appears clutching the white rose, looking mischievous. Some of the girls are confused as to the white rose’s power. “It’s like an unlimited packet of Tim Tams – it never stops,” Kiki succinctly explains to Georgia, who may be too young to get the reference to the genie ad.
At least Alex waits til he finishes his chat before revealing the rose, and he whisks her off to his dungeon, which is stuffed full of cushions, candles and Moroccan lamps. They share a passion for dirt bikes and realises their relationship will never work because he barracks for West Coast and she’s a Collingwood girl (carn the Pies!).
Keira is super cranky about the white rose, whereas Megan the diving chick sensibly says they would all have done the same.
Alex finally gets to have an in-depth talk with Richie about her son. “I feel just on CLoud Nine and nothing could dampen that feeling,” she says after their chat. And then she sits on a couch near Keira.
“You disappointed me personally,” Keira tells her. “I’ve said it behind your back and I’m telling it to your face.”
Alex doesn’t seem rattled: “I’m going to go to sleep tonight knowing that I’m a good person.” By this point a few of the girls have snuck away, over all the drama. And it just escalates from there.
Finally, one of the other girls encourages Alex to walk away, depriving us of the chance for a glass of wine to be thrown of someone. Can we hurry up already with the rose ceremony>

The rose ceremony

nikkidress
Oh god, Nikki’s green dress is just so wrong. Either cover up the chest or the legs – don’t flash both. God, Tiffany aka plank girl looks totally different to last night, as does Sophie the Mary Louise Parker lookalike, who gets her first bit of airtime, so she’s a goner. Oh – actually, she’s safe, so it’s white hair Laura and former athlete Mia who are goneski, off to watch Osher’s Australian Idol clips.

Later in the season
We get a lengthy montage of clips from upcoming episodes and it looks like Keira is around for a while as we see her in various outfits. And it looks like Richie does lots of pashing. I didn’t want to watch it too closely as it seemed to give a lot away.

And here’s a still from early in the episode.

Megan would rather eat Nutella from a jar than get in a chopper with Richie.

Megan would rather eat Nutella from a jar than get in a chopper with Richie.



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68 Comments

  1. I’m actually glad that Nikki got to be the first solo date. She’s another one of those girls who just seems really genuine and sweet, and I think Richie’s quite fond of her.

    Richie, meanwhile, continues to be the most adorable person in the world. After the ad-break, Richie’s abs return! 🙂

    On the other hand, I know we’re only two episodes into the season, but is anyone else genuinely concerned that Keira is going to end up trying to kill somebody with a stiletto, and end up being forcibly removed from the set by security?

  2. Sam Frost was on the radio answering a few questions about the show.
    She said that the cocktail party was over 2 days, plus one day for the prelim stuff and one day for the to-camera stuff. So Juz, 4 days was a good guess.
    She also said that all the contestants are real people, no plants, so Keira is just your plain old ordinary seriously deluded nutter that you would hope not to meet in a dark alley. Can’t wait for her one-on-one date. That will be car crash television.

    • I am getting sick of Sam Frost. She just can’t let go her 15 secs of fame..

      She has been giving out intimate details about her time on The Bachelorette.

      Then she said she pushed for Richie to be the Bachelor, she approved the new Bachelorette, she gave advice to the girls.
      Then when it is about to die down, she went on about how you know who will be the chosen one, how the producers work.

      Why can’t she shut up and let viewers watch the show?

      In her latest appearance in a magazine, she said she want to put The Bachelorette behind her but she keeps reminding listeners that she is The Bachelorette.

    • Maybe I’ve watched too much UnReal (which is black comedic take on a Bachelor-style show) but surely some of the crazies are headhunted to be on the show, rather than just applying, and encouraged to do so because it could promote their business or whatever.

  3. Some of the girls look so much better without the heavy make up. Nikki is so much better looking tonight than last night

    • I didn’t notice it last night, but wow, there really is a lot of botox and lip-filler in front of the camera, this season.

      • I certainly noticed the lips. It’s a bit off putting.
        I don’t have a problem with Botox. I wish I’d know about it my (late) 20s.

    • I’m annoyed he keeps saving the Singing Girl and Keira. Although I’m glad he saved Sophia, since we’ve spent maybe 2 seconds with her over the last two nights (and the other two girls, I don’t even remember seeing them before).

      While Megan and Alex are still certainly odds-on favourites, I think Nikki has more than an outside chance of sticking around for a while, too. Olena, too, because my gosh, she’s beautiful.

  4. Wow, did anyone else notice this trick. Andrew pulled the single date card out of his bottom. Replay it if you don’t believe me.

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    • Hilarious Juz
      That and Rosie’s reviews make watching this drivel worth it.
      I’m going to call it – final two are Megan and Olena.

      • See, I don’t like Rosie’s reviews, I find Rosie a little too abrasive for me. I don’t find her that funny.

        OTOH, Jo Thornly’s recaps (over on a news site) rock my world.

    • I enjoyed the montage. But I am also enjoying the show more than series 1 and 2 (I missed Bach Sam’s season).
      8 am a bit careful…a bit…about what I write here in case the girls read this. Like not wanting to point out which girls aren’t. 😜

  5. I hated Nikki’s gold 80’s nanna dress on the first night, but tonight’s green lantern outfit was worse. Sometimes too much open neckline is too much.

      • Agree, Littleptal. She looked better in the shorts.
        I think most of the girls look pretty sometimes then at otner times, no.

        I think Alex knows how to use her charms. I look fd to seeing more of Megan because she seems genuine.
        I am pretty much ignoring Keira and Eliza because they are definitely producer plants.

        • Producers will make sure Keira last much longer. Everybody is talking about her. She wont win Richie’s heart but she will get her 15 secs of fame or shame. Mission accomplished. Also she is the best friend to Richie’s cousin, Lisa Clarke.

    • I like Nikki too, but my first thought seeing her at the second cocktail party was, “oh no, she forgot the front of her dress!”

  6. Megan is a bit like Natalie Braisingthwaite but without the screaming. And Bindi Irwin.
    Alex is reminding of someone that I can’t place and it’s annoying me. She is like Olivia d’Abo, but there is someone else too.

    I don’t mind Sasha’s cheeky sense of humour.

  7. I’m glad he kept Sophie. She had problem hair on the first night and I am keen to get a closer look to see what’s going on.

    Olena is marvellous. Such a relief to hear a bit of actual conversation on a date, and I like her wry sense of humour in the asides to camera.

    The editing around Keira, the sound effects, so funny. This is a surprisingly great season, so far!

  8. Well, Nikki’s just living up to her Sharon Stone looks flashing her beaver on set. I think it’s just basic instinct with her.

  9. Looks like Megan would rather eat Nutella from a jar than kiss Richie, from what I’m seeing in the latest promo. Awkward City.

    • That’s kind of how he came across to me. He is very sharp featured which can be a sign of a teeny tiny guy.
      He reminds me too much of a blond Tom Cruise for me to think that he is attractive.

    • I was sitting 5m away from him but played it cool. He coped very well with a lot of women grabbing him for hugs and selfies and seemed a genuinely good bloke. He is very lean – not an ounce of body fat. Probably average height. Very handsome in person.

    • There are lots of religions that don’t allow, or strictly limit, TV. I had a friend who was High Church Baptist (saw TV as wasting time), Mormons/Seventh Day Aventist (never been able to understand the difference) and some Episcopalians (now that’s an interesting conversation to have).
      This is a rabbit hole.

    • What better way to escape the clutches of a repressive religion than go on a show that celebrates fornication, alcohol and “being in the moment”?

      It explains to some degree why the upcoming kissing scene appears so awkward,, however. The religion I was raised in said that pashing leads to intercourse………and that’s not always true.

      Megan should have at least been briefed that Bachie will try to kiss anything that moves.

  10. Juz , my daughter was “not very cool” . She did say he was very nice. Also sent through a pic. I nearly didn’t recognize him.

    • Lol. He seemed rather chatty – perhaps he was one of those kids who talks and fidgets so much his mum made him take up abseiling so she’d get some peace.

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